Hello. I trust that everyone has had a chance to ponder the message from last week. This week I want to talk about prejudice.
Chances are that if you ask someone if they are prejudiced, they will say no. Mainly because it is not a cool thing to be or because they don't believe they are.
Telling people that you aren't prejudiced because you have friends or family members that are another race doesn't make you any less of a racist. It just says that your family is multicultural. Everybody has prejudice in them.
What makes prejudice wrong is how you react to it. You can learn from the fact that you are prejudiced and take steps to change your perception.
They are several ways to find out if you are prejudiced or not. The first is to play the word association game. I got this idea from a good friend of mine who tested it and gave people she encountered a wake up call. This how it works: I am going to give you several words and you say the first thing that comes into your mind. Ready?
When I took this test I was appalled at some of the thoughts I carry around. I didn't even realize that they were there, but I learned from the experience. I already knew that I needed work on my prejudice. I discovered this fact a few years ago when my southern girlfriend's sons started bringing (only) Caucasian girls home. I asked here how she felt about it. Even thought she was disappointed, she said she was just glad that her sons brought girls home.
I sat back and thought about that for a while. I have dated everybody. I considered myself an “equal opportunity type of gal.” However, I never thought about the possibility of my children bringing home another race.
If you are as honest with yourself as I am; you will notice that when you think of your children and dating; you see them with your race. I have envisioned my children getting married, and each time, they married within our race. It is what I expect, although I'm not sure why. Maybe it is because I assume that is what they will do. We tend to migrate to people who are like ourselves.
Does that mean that if they wanted to marry outside they race, I would be mad? No. Maybe a little disappointed. When all is said and done, I want my children to find people that make them happy. If that person isn't black, so be it. I can handle that. I could even handle my child coming home with a person of the same sex. I can't say that I would approve for personal reasons, but regardless of what they do, I am their mother and I will always love them.
I want you to close your eyes and think of your children. If you don't have any, think down the road to when you do. What do you see when it comes to the people they date? Have you prepared yourself for the fact that, in this day and age, their choices could be outside what you expect? If you can handle that, what about the two of them reproducing? How do you feel about that? I know these may be harsh questions, but it is better to find out if you are prejudice now than later. At least now you have a chance to change if you want to do so.
Webster defines prejudice as an “adverse opinion” or “judgement formed beforehand” or without full knowledge or complete examination of the facts. Is this you?
`Til next week, be safe.